生日蛋糕上的邪恶诅咒 2010 年 10 月 08 日 at 02:09

生活中总有一些东西被人们赋予了特别的意义。比如生日蛋糕。

至于谁在何时赋予它们这样的特别意义,我也不知道。我只是从开始就被他们灌输这样的观念——
“生日蛋糕只能生日的时候吃。”

并且他们非常严肃地说:

“生日蛋糕上都有邪恶的诅咒!不是生日的时候吃,会发生坏事情的!”

什么坏事情呢?每次的答案都是不一样的。比如感冒,扁桃体发炎,走路摔倒,丢失钱包,失业失恋,婚姻出现危机……等等。

并且这样的事情确实会发生。虽然你明知道不管是否在不应该吃的时候吃了那个生日蛋糕,这样的事情都难免发生,但是一旦你真的偷吃了生日蛋糕,他们就会跳出来说:

“看吧,坏事情发生了吧?明明告诉过你不应该偷吃那个蛋糕的。”

于是我们就开始半信半疑了——也许真的是有联系的吧,说不定真的是那样的,大概蛋糕和命运之间真的有什么莫名其妙的联系吧——然后再看到生日蛋糕的时候就产生了恐惧,纵然非常想吃也碍于心中那道人为制造的壕沟而止步。
我曾经和一个长辈说探讨过类似的问题。当然不好直接去问,便找一个比较委婉的话题开始。

“您有没有吃过一些本来可以吃别人却不许您吃的东西呢?”

“那样的东西啊——你是说供品之类的吧?”

“供品?”

“对,就是放在供桌上祭拜祖先或者神明的那种东西。馒头、水果、小菜等等。”

“这样啊。可以详细说说吗?”

“哦,这要从我小的时候说起——”他眯着眼睛一边回忆一边说,“我小的时候我经常看见大人们把各种好吃的东西摆在供桌上。我当然是很想吃掉它们的,但是大人们说‘这是给祖先和神明享用的,如果你吃了,他们会责怪你并且显灵来惩罚你的’。”

“然后呢?”

“小孩子那管那么多事情,毕竟食欲是最大的诱惑嘛,”他笑着说,“趁大人们不注意我还是偷偷拿了一些去吃——不光是我,其他孩子也都是这么干的,只是一旦被大人发现了,就要挨打或者在祖先的灵位前罚跪,那滋味可不好受。”

“吃那些东西没有鬼魂啊神仙啊什么的显灵来惩罚您吗?”

“当然没有。怎么会有那种东西存在?”他有点惊讶地看着我说,“你们年轻人也相信这个?那都是老人们迷信的说法——或者是为了把祭拜的形式进行下去而编出来吓唬小孩子的话而已。”

“原来如此。”我说,“那你觉得平时吃吃生日蛋糕怎么样?”

“平时怎么可以吃那个东西!那个只有生日时才能吃的——不然会被诅咒的!”
他的反应我一点都不意外。相信祖先的鬼魂也好,相信生日蛋糕带来的厄运也好,如果你相信那就相信好了——这并不会对你的生活造成多大的损失,反之似乎也一样。

随着时代的进步,纵然还有很多人保留着供桌,上面摆的早就是不会变质的塑料食品了。人们不再相信吃掉供品会招来什么鬼魂或者神明的惩罚——同样的道理,总有一天人们都会明白,生日蛋糕就像当初摆在供桌上的祭品一样不过是普通的食物,它上面的HAPPY BIRTHDAY这样特殊的象征意义只是用奶油写上去的。我们完全可以当它不存在,或者毫不费力地把它一抹而去,享受蛋糕的美味。

至于坏事情,该发生的还是要发生,因噎废食实在过于愚蠢。

当然如果你提前吃生日蛋糕而吃得太急咬到舌头或者吃得太多不幸腹泻——这样的事情总有发生的几率——千万不要叫出声来。否则的话,他们又要出现在你面前嘲笑说:

“看,不听我们的话,尝到后果了吧?”

至少在“他们”完全彻底消失于这个世界之前,我们还是不要声张的好。

(2006-03-05 21:00:25)

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